Lent- walls

As I drive around Tucson, I see walls.   On the East coast there are wood fences, usually hidden by the trees or undergrowth.  No trees, no undergrowth here!  No trees, no wood fences. But lots of stone and stucco and they are so much more visible.  Or perhaps, as a visitor, I'm more aware of them.

Typical wall of a neighborhood

Sometimes they are fancy with patterns...

Or crafted with native stone. 

Sometimes they are white and striking...

sometimes dull and boring. 

Some houses have a "wall" distinguishing it from the street.  Desert style.

Even churches have walls around them.

Standard adobe wall.....

Step back and see the church behind. 

 Not all walls are bad- in the desert, walls keep out snakes and rodents. People need boundaries to feel safe and secure.  We recognize mine from yours.  Even in our inner spaces, we have "walls" in place that guard from improper exposure. We are safe with walls.

But Lent can be a season of hiding behind another kind of wall- the wall of "I gave up chocolate, tv, coffee... for Lent and that's my bit." Or the evangelical wall - "Our church doesn't do Lent, isn't that Catholic?"


But Lent is the season for all of God's people as a body to reflect on the coming death and resurrection of Christ. It is also a wonderful time to examine our hearts and see how we have let the cares of the world, the distractions, the busyness of modern life to dull us to His sacrifice, His love, His heart.

For we also have created walls in our faith life. 

Walls of.....

Busy

Wounded

Distracted

Betrayed

Complacent

Hurt

Tired

This Lent season, as I explore a new geography here in the Southwest, I'm reflecting on the walls I have allowed in my life.  I am trying to be mindful of the ways I distance myself from God.  I am picking at some walls that have put a barrier between me and the fullness of God in my life. I started to say tear down but most of the life of faith isn't that big and dramatic, it is just be aware and faithfully removing yet another stone. 

Sometimes we are concerned that the stones of our inner walls are too firmly set or too big or it is too much work to tackle what's behind the wall.

 Some of my walls are fancy- travel sometimes distracts me. Some of my walls are dull and boring- just being lazy in my time reading His book.  

 If I had to name the wall that most separates me from Jesus, it would be FEAR. 

While I'm brave behind the wheel on a cross country trek; I struggle with fear of what I cannot control. You would think that since the death of my husband- a fear I carried for most of my military marriage, I'd have tackled that wall.  The worst happened and God sustained me. Life continued and it is good.  

But now I fear for my children and their children. I wake at night in irrational panic and wonder what will happen next, when the next shoe will drop.   I fear and I know it is the wall that separates me from the joy, the peace, the love that He desires for me.         For all His people. 

Even the cactus says "Could be danger here!"

But this is a park.
A refuge

A place of beauty and lovely words. 

A place in the urban desert with running water and burbling fountains.
A refuge

http://www.tohonochulpark.org/wordpress/gardens/visit-gardens/

My word for this year is "Relax- God is big"

So God, I'm trying. I'm letting go pebble by pebble, I'm reminding myself of your love. I'm digging out another stone when they worry their way to the surface of my soul.  I am seeking refuge in Your word and with Your people. Within that safe place, within the walls of Your protective love and care, I'm releasing myself to write and examine my fear. I am nourishing myself with the beauty of Your creation- knowing that You also sustain it and sustain me.  You have only goodness toward me.  

^{Phillipians 4:4} Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! ⁵ Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. ⁶ Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding,will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

⁸ Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. ⁹ Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. 

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Philippians+4&version=NIV

Oh, for my walls to be winsome, an invitation to come into a safe refuge and play! 

Lent- Unexpected Water

This week in Tucson, it snowed and not just a few flakes, although even that that sends all the residents out into the streets to stare awestruck up to the sky. No, this was a bit of a brief blizzard.  Huge wet flakes came down from the sky- shook loose and blowing around like goose down after a good pillow fight.  Students went outside to make wet, sloppy snow balls.  Businessmen left their desks to just be out in the cold and bluster, so unlike the usual winter in the desert.

And I went out with my camera.  I've been quite sick- a head cold has laid me low and all my plans for art galleries and music concerts were set aside for long naps and pots of tea.  But even a nasty cold couldn't keep me from the beauty being created outside my door.

It begins

The classic saguaro- hard to capture against a white sky

The amazing details of God's creation

Prickly pear with a frosty outline

Weight of winter

Another kind of cactus

Snow softened spikes

Transformed

Desert dwellers look for water in any form but most rain comes to the Sonoran desert in the late summer monsoons.  So this winter snow "storm" was an unexpected provision of water. 

I find myself just looking for God's provision in the usual ways.  The big rains of His presence at yearly retreats, monthly gatherings for prayer or worship, even weekly church services.  These are the places, the times we expect to hear from God.   

But what about the unexpected snows in our personal desert? 

I love the remarkable times when God has poured Himself out.  Sometimes I didn't even know I needed a fresh drink. Sometimes the Glory of God breaks into my life and I am caught off guard.  And I want to be off my guard.  To live a guarded life is to live, well, without a camera in a desert snow storm. Without awareness of the beauty being created in my life. 

This week the water was given- snow drifted to earth from water laden clouds to coat the land and the cacti with a reminder of the gift. The snow provided water for the desert but not in an expected way. 

 As I rushed out to capture the beauty, I was reminded that not only does God  provide water for the desert, He does it in His time and  in His way.

Outlined in white

Mesquite trees frosted with snow

Peace

Lent is a season to contemplate and search ourselves. I'm going to take time and search for the unexpected refreshment, the water of His timing and ways. 

The next day.... snow on the mountains but the mesquite are back to desert green.